I'm out!

I am sat in the comfort of my own home writing this - hurrah! My blood counts hit the magic number and enough of my immune system has now returned from it's New Year's break to allow me into the germ infested world.

The NHS treated me well, I have to say. A&E was incredibly busy and there clearly weren't enough staff/too many people with flu. There was also one absolute idiot who turned very nasty at about 2am in the morning for something that quite frankly wasn't appropriate for A&E (I was stood next to them at the reception clerking area) so do feel qualified to comment - even the receptionist was asking why he hadn't seen the GP when it happened 3 weeks ago).

Sadly, because there were so many people with potential flu in A&E I was confined to my side-room in A&E. This was probably a good thing given the general mayhem outside in the general area. I didn't sleep at all. That's 2 Saturday evenings I have now spent in A&E - it is fast becoming a habit! The hospital was full and they needed to find me a side-room because of the risk of infection. This took until Sunday lunchtime. They managed to find me a side-room on the oncology/haematology ward and I have to say, it was lovely (caveat: for a hospital room). Which is just as well as I wasn't allowed to leave this room either but at least I had my own en-suite bathroom this time. The nursing staff were all great too and couldn't do too much for me. They had a selection of head-gear (all free) so I spent an hour or so trying it all on and have a couple of new scarves/caps.

Cancer is a great leveller and nowhere has it been more evident than on this ward. Whilst I was one of the youngest I wasn't the youngest. The youngest was a man of around 20 in the open bay opposite. Let's just say that he was hand-cuffed to his bed and accompanied by at least one prison guard at all times. Made me think.

Yesterday I was granted the privilege of being able to leave my room and go to the hospital shop. I treated myself to a packet of polos and a magazine before wandering back to the ward.

So today the news came that my counts were good enough to go home. Woop woop! This was great news on a variety of different levels, especially as I made it soon enough to pick up Briony from school. Sadly I do have the same antibiotics that made me sick last time but this time I will take the anti-emetics religiously!

It also meant that I made the consultant appointment this evening. He said he thought I looked really well and had expected me to look a lot worse! We discussed the aftermath of cycle 2 and how I had been really well up until the latest adventure. In summary, he thinks I'm responding to treatment as the lump feels a different texture and size. The scans will tell us more. These will be at the end of the month (CT to check out what those nasty nodules in my lungs have been up to, MRI breast to look at the main event and measure vs. original scans) and then will be reviewed prior to cycle 4. More concerning is the fact that I have had 2 cycles and ended up in hospital both times. There are a number of options this presents:
1. Drop the dose of the drug most likely to be battering my immune system
2. Try the GCSF again next cycle and see what happens
3. Give me prophylactic antibiotics

After discussion we decided on option 2. I don't want to drop the dose as this will impact the effectiveness. He didn't want to give prophylactic antibiotics for a number of different reasons. He has said categorically that if I end up in hospital again next time then a dose reduction will happen. This gives me a very easy target to work to! I don't want this to happen so we discussed ways of me reducing further any risk of infection. These include a weird and wonderful diet of don't eat and eat foods. I'm prepared to give it a try.

We also discussed whether what had happened would delay the next cycle. He didn't think it would because of the way my counts are coming back up. There are 2 things that are important with the treatments, the dose and the timings, so changes to either are not in your favour.

So for the next few days my aim is to try and keep/get myself as well a possible prepared for the next cycle.

I'm off to bed now for a decent night's sleep. Can't wait! Sweet dreams everyone x